I have a huge confession………….I’ve been experiencing post marathon blues, BAD! Like, really bad. I know I’ve probably mentioned it before but I realized last night that I’ve been in a major funk.
After January I realized due to some personal stuff that 2012 was not going to be the racing year I thought it was going to be. And I’ll be the first to admit, when I’m up ……..I’m up and when I’m down, well, I’m down. My mother use to say I go at things like a bull in a china closet. It can be a blessing and at times it bites me in the tail feathers. So after I realized there would be no Austin I put on my game face of “I’m okay with it, next!” and proceeded to do what I do best, forget the past and move forward.
That’s all fine and dandy but I let myself sink into a hole. I know, it’s just running, it’s just a marathon but if you’ve never ran a marathon or trained for anything then you just can’t understand. It’s like this………….for every marathon I train for there’s at least 12 weeks of my life that I throw myself into this event wholeheartedly. When I’m at work I think about it, when I’m laying in bed I’m counting the hours till my morning run, I rearrange my life to get ready for this event. It becomes who I am. Then it comes and I relish in the day. The people, the excitement, the emotions. After it’s over there’s at least two weeks I get to tell people about it and still live in the excitement. Then I have a choice I can pick another event to delay the let-down feelings that await me or I can do as I’ve been doing. Go into denial and pretend I’m okay and try to figure out what to do with myself.
It sucks. I’ve not been excited about running or working-out. I’ve done everything I can to pump myself up but without a marathon I’m just, ehhh. How’s my running going? ehhhh How’s my nutrition? ehhhhh How’s my blog? ehhhhh What kind of stinky attitude is that?!!
So this morning, I woke up with a new attitude. I got a good night sleep and hit the floor running this more with the mindset of enough moping around. Enough is enough. If I was a friend of mine, I would be so annoyed with me. And I am. Which is really bad truth be told.
So from here forward no more downs. The glass is not half empty but half full. I should be grateful for all that I have and have experienced. I’m still a runner not matter if I run 1 mile or 50 miles. The post marathon blues are officially over.